Thursday, April 14, 2011

Why they don't let me write the scripts

From the second episode of Sherlock, as near as I can recall:

Watson:  "But how did you know that he had traveled around the world two times in the last month?"
Sherlock: "It's perfectly obvious.  The chronometer on his watch was off by two days.  The watch doesn't know when you've crossed the dateline, which he must have done twice. And Breitling just released that model in February, so it has to be within the last month."

What Watson should have responded: "Or maybe he didn't read the manual for his watch and hasn't figured out how to set the 'day' dial yet.  Ever think of that, Braniac?"

Using Sherlock's logic, my living room is in some sort of 1-hour-off temporal warp for 6 months out of every year.

Sherlock: "My God, Watson, do you realize what this means?  They are running a particle accelerator in the basement, causing gravity to warp in the room right above it.  Printing fake banknotes is just a cover for their development of a dark matter super weapon they'll use to bring down all the governments of the world!"
Watson: "Or maybe it's just a severe pain in the ass to rehang that clock without the pendulum falling off and scratching the inside of the case, so they don't bother to reset it when the time changes.  You have got to stop overestimating these people.  Also, if you ever again try to come along on one of my dates and almost get my girlfriend shot with a crossbow I will beat you to death with this cane that I no longer need because you oh-so-cleverly made me forget it when we rushed out and chased over half of London ON FOOT to try to catch a suspect in a taxi.  Got that straight, Dumbass?"

Also, "Benedict Cumberbatch" is the best name, ever.


Michael said...


memorandis said...

It doesn't make sense anyway, because the watch can't be more than 23 hours off, regardless of how many times you crossed the dateline.