Why? Why would he think that was a good idea?

The Toenail has been doing much better recently, especially since I was converted to the wonders of soaking injuries in Epsom salt.  Turns out those old timers knew what they were talking about, at least when it comes to foot pain.  Honest to god, the first time I soaked the still-swollen, achy Toenail for 15 minutes, it immediately cut my pain level in half.  I did the same thing again the next day, and not only did The Toenail no longer hurt, but the ache I get in my big toe joint was gone, too.  Wicked cool!

That was a week or so ago, and now that things aren't swollen anymore, the parade of colors in The Toenail has stopped.  It hasn't fallen off yet, or even loosened, but I figured I'd better ask the doctor about it while I was there getting my prescriptions refilled today anyway.

My doctor is a bit, um, eccentric sometimes.  Ask Jason about how he and the doctor used to play with the leftover liquid nitrogen when Jason was getting some warts frozen off - good times, good times.

Me:  So, it's still on there, and it's not like it got bad enough that I broke down and bought one of those little drills to relieve the pressure, but I still thought I should have you look at it.
Dr:  No, you don't want to do that.  They actually sell those drills?  You don't need one of those.  All you have to do is heat up the end of a paper clip in a candle and burn a hole through the nail.  You don't need a fancy drill for that.

And while he's saying this, he's poking around at the toenail, and trying to actively lift the thing off.  My precious toenail, the one I might sort of NEED IF I'M GOING TO WALK 18 MILES THIS SATURDAY FOR TRAINING.

Me:  Gah!  Are you crazy?  Dude, don't do that!  I want it to stay on as long as possible!
Dr: It's totally going to fall off anyway.
Me:  No!  Look, it's still pink around part of it!**  Maybe it will hang in there!  Besides, everything I saw online said I should leave the old nail in place as long as I could so the new nail wouldn't grow in all crooked and stuff.
Dr: Psht.  Nails don't grow in crooked.  What else did the internet tell you?

The internet told me that there are 50,000 hits when you search for "runner toenail grow in crooked," and close to 200,000 if you change it to the past tense.  Also, it just told me not to look at the wikipedia entry for ingrown toenails on a full stomach ... blargh.

**Lovely photo of my injury after the jump to protect all you squeamish weenies out there ... you have to click on the title of the post in order to see the part after the jump (I think).




 Look, a picture, just like you've always wanted!  Be grateful I didn't use the "extra large" posting size ...