Vermont Country Store

Way back when, I used to be on every catalogue mailing list in the Western hemisphere. With all the moves we've made over the past decade, though, I've managed to avoid being re-added to most of them. That's why I was surprised to find a copy of the Vermont Country Store catalog in the mail last month.

I used to enjoy reading the catalog, which specializes in hard-to-find stuff ... which is about the best description I can come up with. Lanz nightgowns, shampoo brands you thought had been discontinued in the 1960s, candy you can't buy in your area of the country, and cheesy yet frightening Christmas decorations ... that gives you a pretty good overview.

So you can imagine my surprise when I was flipping through this latest issue and found a whole page of stuff like this:

"Intimate Solutions for The Next Stage In Your Life."

Apparently Granny now requires "8 levels of rotation and vibration" plus a "soft gel-filled head with a rotating pearl-filled shaft."

Really, don't we all?